If.............

Yesterday I had participated in a quiz at work..partly to break away from the monotony of life and partly to know if my IQ level has already hit a century or not!

But there was this one question which particularly caught my attention.It goes thus....Francis Crick remarked "I've got the secret of life" after discovering what? ...I did answer this(For those who came in late...Its the DNA structure that builds us all up!)...But it got me thinking...

What , after all , is the secret of life...?????I am still thinking...

Perhaps the only answer that's felt nice so far is this song I heard as a child:
"If I were a butterfly, I'd thank you Lord for giving me wings,
If I were a robin in the tree,I'd thank you Lord for I could sing.....

...
But I thank you Lord for making me ...me!"

This I feel is the secret of life....

Utopia

A colleague of mine introduced me to these lines…thought I’d share it with my blog:

“Imagine there’s no country, it isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for and no religion too
Imagine all the people living life in peace...

You may say I'm a dreamer but I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us and the world will be as one”
Imagine - JOHN LENNON

I felt these lines were lovely- utopian but beautiful! Only a dreamer could say this – someone who loves life and the world!

Wouldn’t this be great? – to be in a world that has no barriers – no military, no war , no politics and no killing…….Wouldn’t it be lovely to believe in one force that protects us and not in numerous religions?

Thankfully, I have been born in a family where I was taught to believe in goodness of a religion rather than the orthodoxy of it…but how do you blame those who weren’t? How do you blame people who think wars are a way of protesting for all the bad that ever happened to anyone? They were brought up that way….not their fault…but the world suffers for them….

We, humans, can’t fight destiny – we can’t resist natural disasters or poverty or death …..But there are some things we can …..we can dissolve class barriers , we can forgive people who mistakenly caused harm to us , we can trust people who live around us, , we can smile at the hungry child who lives by the road , we can spread love to people who need it the most….these are things in our hand…..things that will make this world a better place to live in…..a world which will be “One”……..someday………

Back with a Bong!!!

I still remember the enthusiasm with which I had begun blogging......writing down almost everything that was happening to me..every feeling that would strike a chord....incoherent and yet meaningful chain of thoughts all penned down under my blog....

And then,I guess, I grew up....and voila....I was suddenly so busy..there was work everywhere..life just got to going to work and back...exhausted and dying for sleep..

Not true!! One can never be so busy as not to find time for oneself...never so engaged so as to not notice how one's moving on in life....never so occupied to not know how we gradually grace ourselves towards senility...

I believe its just a pretence we all like to put on...a facade of the "busy" me to perhaps make oneself believe that our life's in a standstill puddle of "busy" engagements....But that's NOT true,for Christ's sake!

So may be this is my moment of realisation...a moment when I realise college memories look really distant...school memories almost minuscule..when I realise that life's soon progressing towards a phase when I might not be the same again...when I realise how I have to cling onto things that make me happy,things that excite me,things that remind me of the small joys of life.........and so I'm back to blogging....

I know this post is no where close to "Back with a bang" feel...but at least its a decent start....its a nice moonlit night in a completely mesmerising California lagoonside..and here I am blogging away to glory!!!

Its time to awaken my Sentience all over again...

Hail Pujo!

One of my initial posts had something that I had to say about Durga Puja and how I missed it then. This Pujo (as we “Bongs” prefer calling it) I, thankfully, don’t have to mourn thus!!!! I am all here in Kolkata raving to enjoy every moment of the festival that so precisely describes the Bengali fervor

Pujo is much more than a mere festival to Bengalis( I remember reading a Vir Sanghvi article in which he defines a Bengali as one who’s ever had anything to do with Bengal)….But then each festival is special to one who celebrates it! So let me put what I personally feel about Pujo instead of a generic description of it……

I have been more of a cosmopolitan for most of my life. I would probably have spent only a handful number of Pujos in Kolkata….but even that memory is flabbergasting!! Be it the frenzy that drives people (count me among those too, readers) as if this is the first time they’ve been to a store since lightening struck all their clothes or the suffocating crowd that rushes before the pandals(read: designed arenas where the idol is worshipped…..actually it’s a lot more than I can describe) …….the Pujos have it all. It is perhaps the only festival that satiates the hysteria we Bengalis are so infamously famous for!!

I feel Pujo in the mellow fragrance of Autumn winds, in the blue of the sheath above, in the smell of new clothes, in the rumbling of the dhhak( read: Bengali version of drum) around in the anticipation of the Bengali heart within....I feel Pujo everywhere….

Home again....

Finally!!!
Finally I’m posting after a hiatus….finally its raining like crazy here…finally I am home.

Today I do not have any string of thought or any opinion to express….Today it’s just a feeling I’d like to share….

I have been away from home for about 6 years now…almost felt like a guest in my own house…with delicacies being prepared every time I came, with tasks being listed down for every moment that I stayed, with relatives complaining my lack of social interaction during the few days that I graced my presence at home. Being at home was almost synonymous to holidays for me…..and somewhere deep down that wasn’t what I wanted. I wanted to be at home- literally and beyond.

So today that I am here….. (Touchwood) but I’m loving it. Screaming roadies, honking buses, water-logged streets, and humidity – no one in their right state of mind would call this bliss. But I do. I do because this is where I want to be….this is where I need to be…and this is where I have to be.

I doubt if I’m making much sense to readers…Pardon me for this abstract piece of writing…but as I said my “Sentience” shall only reflect my state of mind….and this is exactly how it is.

Yes, I am home.

The fan.......

Typically I should call this post to be “inspired” by this particular write-up I read. These days I have been reading “Chicken Soup for Working Women”(Awrite there…..Don’t laugh at me)…Nice inspirational stories-yes…..But I read them for the real life ones which are everyday stories like those Readers’ digest stuff I usually like.

So there was this article about a working mother, also a single parent to a two year old. She talked about how she would strive hard to stuff the kid with toys / objects that could keep him busy and her free for other chores….till one day when she told him to watch the ceiling fan whilst she did other work… And then he pulled her to watch the fan so as to provide her with respite from those humdrum stuff…..

I could completely relate to this bit. Very often we tend to get so occupied in our daily lives that we forget to live in the present….I do not remember watching a starlit sky in years now…or observing a butterfly sitting on the wall before me…..or smelling the first rain….Though I love them all….Then what am I aiming for, in life???

Blame all these so-to-say boring posts on those philosophical pangs that occasionally trouble me nowadays. But I have reserved this blog to express my state of mind…I have to push off now. I was allowed only these ten minutes of spare time to spend on my thoughtful stances. Enough for the day. I guess?!! :)

But really…..I would love to watch the ceiling fan rotate one day….minus thoughts of the past failures or future endeavors…of meetings I goofed up….of appointments that await me….I would love to live in the present moment…one day!!!!!

My Sentience personified.......

My mum remarked the other day that somehow the word “ma” (in whatever form/language it may be) exudes a feel of security, warmth and unconditional love. She was probably missing my grandma (her mum) a bit too much that day…..

But those words really got me thinking. ….And this post shall have all those threads of thoughts that got me pensive after ages that day….

If I may bore you readers with a small walk down my memory lane, I’d like to share this small incident here. I had once met this nun (Pardon my amnesiac head here…can’t mention her name) as a kid. She happened to say something which has somehow left a mark in my heart, probably forever.

She told me that all mothers are special-but that mine was a little more. I’m sure each one of us would like to believe so. But since this is my post I’d like to tell you why I feel so (Readers please do share your thoughts about the same).

Today, when I can proudly and humbly (whoa!!!What a paradox) call myself a career woman, I do realize the importance of being on one’s own feet...The feeling of being able to wake up each morning to know that you would have to rush to work, the feeling of buying your dear ones cute li’l things with your own salary, the feeling of knowing that you are revered at your workplace…..the feeling of creating a niche for your own self is simply ecstasy! I understand that today.

And to be able to achieve all that and then give it up just for your child is something I call grit. A lawyer of my mum’s caliber could have soared high today….To give up all that and more so as to let your child grow up as an able human being is something that sure deserves appreciation.

So this goes as a thank-you note to her this “Mothers’ Day”.

Thank you for everything Ma!!!

“For I know the plans I have for you”

Of late I have been visiting quite a few blogs…And as I discover the thoughts of fellow beings, I can’t really help thanking God for what I have!!!

True, life hasn’t been a bed of roses so far…There have been moments of pique and failures…..There have been bouts of monotony….and pangs of untoward thoughts. There have been times I’ve complained of so many things that I almost sounded like Calvin (of C&H fame of course)….

And yet when I came across this article about Nick Vujicic, I realized how kind life’s been. I remember this poem I read as a child (and I’m sure many of you readers might just have glanced over it). It was a child’s confession as to how she complained of her ugly feet or eyes till she saw a lame or blind person…I remember the poem had got me thinking with that tiny little brain of mine even then….Nick Vujicic reminded me of the same poem all over again…..May his kind continue to motivate us earthlings……He sure is an exemplary creation of God!!!!This was a quote on his website(do take time out to check out the link):

Jeremiah 29:11 – “For I know the plans I have for you”, declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Kudos to all those who dare to dream ….to those who achieve them and all those who don’t!!!!

An afterthought....

I just read this news article which I thought was quite interesting….

Being a celebrity has its own pros and cons – one would agree…You are under constant vigil of the entire world and each thing you say/do would be scrutinized till the end…My due respect to them all. It’s definitely a tough life under those arc-lights…

But the money/fame going into the head, though inevitable, cannot be justified. Now what on earth could vindicate Ms. Campbell throwing her cell phone at that poor guy??? It’s yet more ludicrous how a certain twenty-something singer shaves her head off and that becomes the talk of the glam-world…

I’m really glad that these re-habs are being practically implemented (that’s if the link up there states the fact!!) Not that it guarantees such irresponsible actions won’t be repeated but at least it’s a step towards building a better world!!

tempo libero.........

What does an IT professional do when there's no release coming up....when there's no exciting tool to be studied..or no enhancement in progress...and of course when there's a computer at one's disposal???Well,in one of those bouts I happened to spot these links....calls for a decent time-pass...Thought of putting these up on my blog..........
http://blogthings.com/thefivefactorpersonalitytest/
And then there are the types which know "all"(mind you) about your past....
http://blogthings.com/whowereyouinhighschoolquiz/
Then I got a bit intrigued by the funny captions that could put the latest tarot card readers to shame...Sample this:
http://blogthings.com/whatcolorshouldyourblogorjournalbequiz/
But this one takes the cake....
http://blogthings.com/howmuchhaveyouchangedin10yearsquiz/
Somehow wanted to put my personalised one up here:

You've Changed 44% in 10 Years

You've done a good job changing with the times, but deep down, you're still the same person. You're clothes, job, and friends may have changed some - but it hasn't changed you.

How Much Have You Changed in 10 Years?

Oh and I heaved a sigh of relief with this one:

You Are 23 Years Old

Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

Ne plus ultra....

I remember listening this particular song as a child…a typical Bollywood-ishtyle children song…in which they wish to make the world as per their will…and eradicate everything else….I realize the relevance of the song today…

I know I might sound to some as a rather “out of mind” case…but I believe there does exist something like “Utopia”...so what if only it is in one’s mind…Anything where things happen as per one’s own will…where there are no restrictions/conflicts…where every person is “normal” (that’s when every person thinks like oneself)…is almost close to “Utopia”…

And yet…I would love to stay in a world that’s imperfect….in a world that’s full of people who aren’t “my type”…in a world where I have to strive to get what I want….probably that’s what keeps us all going….Perfection’s rather boring!!!

Life’s probably all about rejoicing these un-expected moments of mirth amidst tragic strifes...about smiling when you hear your favourite number during brain-hammering sessions of work….about seeing mom get you coffee to relax when your computer has crashed down…….about getting an unexpected call from your long-lost friend when your boss has just screamed at you….Ah now!!!That’s Utopia to me….

??

There’s a lot more to life than meets the eye..and probably its realisation time for me…Of late a lot of things have been happening around me which could categorically be termed as bizarre or to say the least unpleasant!!

Good things ,as they say,happen to good people…But the not-so-nice things which have happened in the recent past have affected “good people” the most! I do tend to question my firm belief on the “karma” concept…..What is it that rules one’s life? When does one get a reward for being true to one’s conscience?

A friend of mine had once said…”I’ll pray that your wish comes true if it is good for you”…probably that is the essence of life…things that are good for oneself in the long run happen…but the intermediate period of pain is what hurts the most…

These are random thoughts that have been haunting me of late…. Contemplation on this confuses me…and I’m quite sure, bores the reader!!!I apologize for that…But one cannot really write happy observations when such things happen…

I hope I get back to my happy self soon….but then that would require some positive things happening around….Lets see :)

The Cupid's touch!!!

Its been quite sometime that I posted here.....blame it on my project release or lack of interesting events in my life....Now don't get me wrong...there is still absolutely nothing "interesting" in my life..There's just this funny observation which dawned onto me a couple of days back..

Cut to September,2001.This friend of mine I'm going to write about next got introduced to me.The second thing she asks me is "Are you a NON veggie?"(after of course my name)....the response obviously elated her!!!

Now its September2006...the same old us...and she goes like " you know I don't like non veg much na".....and why so.....because madame is "committed" to someone who believes in being herbivorous!!!!

My intention is not to comment on which is better......that's totally beyond my concern...All I am interested is what "going around" can do to you...Not that I haven't met people who've radically changed after this turn of fate....yet everytime this thing intrigues me more so...Perhaps one spends ten times of his(definitely not the lady;)..lucky us!!!) salary/pocket money on phone bills, on restaurant bills , on petrol expenses....and yet never seems to mind that..Perhaps one keeps scribbling sweet nothings on practically any piece of paper around or keep staring at a particular photograph....and yet never seems to tire out of it!!!

I confess...I do not understand the logic...elucidations are welcome!!!!:)

call this a prelude...if you may

Okay so here i am.....they say too much of thinking isn't good for health...I relent to that thought...end my dilemma and hereby enter the blogosphere.

So far my encounter with blogging has been restricted to posting comments for my friends..and thats where the idea of writing my own blog cropped up...somehow i hated the thought of signing up as "anonymous" every time.:)

By convention I am required to introduce myself(somehow seems highly analogous to one's entry to the world).Well I am all of 23(I strictly do not believe that women shouldn't be asked their age...Why not??) working (as every second person is)in the so-called Outsourcing industry that predominates Bangalore. A Bengali(don't dare say Bong;)) by birth, an engineer (work for Toshiba,to be precise)by profession and a blogger by choice.That's me ....And trust me there's lots more to that.

So if you're sure you are fine with the first 3 paragraphs and actually (???%%$$@@#???) want to delve further more into my blog...may i continue??!!!

A cliche , as it may seem , I'd like to tell the tale of how my blog came to be known as "Sentience".I was chatting with a friend of mine..and simultaneously thinking as to what i should call this space of mine..and "eureka"(come to think of it,eureka itself is a decent name..wat say??) I got "sentience".I hate to quote the dictionary..but didn't have better words to describe it - The faculty through which the external world is apprehended..thats sentience for me.I intend to make this space a faculty through which I can express myself to the world.And if you do not mind trowelling more into all that ...do check out for this space..